Days like this, you wonder what the hell are you doing here, sitting in front of the keyboard, shouting at the four empty walls. The furious tapping echoes softly, but the housemates don't hear you, and so don't the neighbours, because it's all in your head. Only a coward hides behind the face of pristine calmness, while heart-wrenching music wails out from the speakers. Your thoughts yearn for a voice, yet the mind whispers doubts, lies, deceit. The fragility of your own sanity sneaks upon you unaware; oh but wait! have you not been here before? The all too familiar dread rolls in, and you tell yourself, 'here we go again..'
Days like this, you just want to curl up under the comforting embrace of the duvet and try to get some sleep. But even the sweet scent of Moroccan roses don't soothe the journey into your dreams. You lie awake knowing that sleep only postpones the inevitable, that one day the skeletons will come out of the closet. The candle at the foot of the bed flickers; Shakespeare flashes across the head -- we are all poor players indeed.. Or maybe it's just me. Outside the window a car drives by. You suddenly wish that somebody would just come and pick you up for a drive. Tail lights disappear into the horizon. Now there is only darkness, and you're back at square one...
Meine Ruh' ist hin,
Mein Herz ist schwer,
Ich finde sie nimmer
Und nimmermehr.
~Zhongy~