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underneath the stars
It is all very well, when the pen flows, but then there are the dark days when imagination deserts one, and it is an effort to put anything down on paper. That little you have achieved stares at you at the end of the day, and you know the next morning you will have to scrape it down and start again. ~Elizabeth Aston
Monday, 30 June 2008
02:10

It's over now and I should really blog about it, but I'm just so emotionally drained now... Watching 'Kungfu Panda' yesterday helped though and I will get down to it soon I guess...


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Wednesday, 18 June 2008
Dedicated to Self...
03:41

For rainy days...

Fix You
Coldplay

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
when you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you


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Thursday, 5 June 2008
A Killer Joke...
06:18

A few days ago, somebody remarked to me, 'Everything to you is a joke huh?'

I wonder how that person ever arrived at that conclusion.

Sometimes when I lie in bed, I wonder what people think of me as a person. Yes it's one of those inevitable questions you ask yourself, despite me being brash and having a I-don't-care attitude about these things. But sometimes the question just pops up into my mind and I do wonder, sometimes, how people perceive me as a person? To tell you the truth, me not being serious about anything is probably one of the last things I'll describe myself as. It's now a very stressful period of time for me, especially having just finished the Yearbook and now having to concentrate on my exams, and maybe having a laugh out of something is just a way for me to alleviate some of these stress. I try not to conform to the stereotype of slouching around with eye-bags and a look of profound seriousness. Being emo now just adds to the dire mood around the school and I prefer a more light-hearted approach to my impending exams. It makes me feel more relaxed and allows me to get into sync faster. Goodness knows there's still more than enough revision to be done over this fortnight.

Still, somehow this statement comes back to haunt me. Whatever that person might mean or intend when he/she said this, it's been bugging me at the back of my mind and I just need to put my feelings down in words. Maybe I'm scared of people not taking me seriously. Maybe not. I don't know. Whatever it is, it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth every time I repeat it to myself. Maybe because I've never heard anyone say this to me before, or maybe it's just too similar to something else I've heard in the past. Still, I thought that I've moved past that... Haih... Sometimes when work becomes second nature, one tries to find ways to make it fun or at the very least, mildly enjoyable. God knows how much I need those grades or whatever I have worked for in the past, and maybe by calling it all 'a joke', I subconsciously find it dismissive of all that I have done or worked my ass off for... I don't know. I haven't given, nor will give any much more thought about this. Instead of brooding over it, I should be concentrating on something else to take my mind of it, but still.... Oh well... I won't be forgetting this any time soon I guess...

What a joke... I nearly died of laughter this time...There were actually tears streaking down my face...~Zhongy~


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Monday, 2 June 2008
Skin Change II
13:24

Changed my blog skin again as I felt that the last one was too dark. Kinda like this one too but the butterfly wings look weird/out of place... Would have prefered angel wings... Hmmmmm.... Anyhow please tell me if this somehow doesn't load on your screens. Also comments can now only be posted in the CBox so make good use of it. Would prefer people not to be anonymous here so that I know who's talking to me:P Anyhow, enjoy!~Zhongy~


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